With the recent mass shootings in Santa Barbara, there are a bunch of people blathering on about the subject, so I’m not really going to do that. Besides, this guy said everything that needed to be said. Instead, I will talk about entitlement, which I think is the cause of an epic shit ton of problems with people. That douchebag felt he deserved the women that rejected him. And you can look at that and say “hey that entitled asshole doesn’t deserve hot chicks just cause he wants them!” And it’s totally 100% accurate. No one is deserving of some woman trophy, no matter how twisted their delusions are.
But you know what? It doesn’t stop there. This attitude is ingrained in our culture. How often have you heard “good things come to those who wait.” Or “if it’s meant to be, it’ll be.” Going through a shitty time? Don’t worry, you’re a good person so things will look up. You can choose to see that for what it is, seemingly harmless little sayings intended to make us feel better when nothing is going our way. But you know what? When time after time something is ingrained into our psyche such as “you will get X in return of all the Y you have done,” you will start expecting things.
“I tipped that bartender 20%, he better come to me first from now on.”
“I complimented that author, how dare she not email me a ‘thank you’ and send me a fruit basket within 24 hours?”
Have you ever gone onto Twitter and read some of the replies to famous peoples’ tweets? Go over there right now and do it. If you want the full experience, pick a pretty actress. Trust me, that’s where the goods are at. They could go on there to say something completely ridiculous, like “I like toast, look at this picture of this tasty toast I just had!”
T-minus zero seconds later they’ll have hundreds of people clamoring for their attention. “I will die if you don’t tweet me.” “How can you ignore your fans, PAY ATTENTION TO ME.” The internet is fraught with the delusions that everyone feels, but magnified. How many times have I said “Ermahgerd I wanna be Jennifer Lawrence’s bff.” The answer probably makes me sound like a total stalker. But I’m not serious (I promise, Jennifer, please call me). But online people feel totally ok saying how creepily desperate they are because it’s safe for them to be with their computer screen acting as their buffer and mask. They feel like they deserve that person’s attention because they are such a big fan. No, you don’t. You don’t deserve a single fucking thing from them. Anything they give back is icing on the cake of the job they do, which you get to enjoy on your televisions and movie screens.
Now let’s talk about religion (because I love pissing people off). There’s a lot of religion out there that teaches you “be a good person, or you’re going to hell.” There’s a lot wrong with that statement. Because I find it slightly terrifying that someone would only try to be a good person under threat of eternal damnation. The flip side of that isn’t any better. “Be a good person, and you get to go to heaven!” This suggests that someone can earn great things (I mean what’s better than eternal salvation, amiright?) by being good to people. It’s nothing but entitlement perpetrated by the church. You, sir, will get this great thing in exchange for all the good things you do. Like there’s some spreadsheet out there where God is counting up all your deeds until you’ve earned enough to be able to join that topless party in the sky with an open bar that you are convinced exists. It could exist, don’t get me wrong. I’m not gonna pretend I know the answer to that question, I simply don’t care if it exists or not.
But back to my point, it’s just one more thing that perpetuates this idea that you will get X in exchange for Y. It is really really hard to keep yourself from doing that. It’s not FAIR is an extremely common statement yelled by children as well as adults on a daily basis. What it really means is “Hey, I deserve more than I’m getting right now and I don’t like that.” Yeah, we all need to get over that bullshit. Do good things, be a good person. You need to adjust your expectations by expecting absolutely nothing in return. Because the truth is, a lot of times you won’t get it. And that is OK.
Even in your daily little things, pay attention to when you’re being entitled. When you’re driving in your car, do you zip ahead of a few more cars before merging because “why should I have to wait longer in line?” Do you jump into conversations because what you have to say is so much more important than what these other people are saying? Have you ever once said the following statement “I think I am entitled…”
This isn’t about “white privilege” or “white male entitlement.” Yes, those are things, but what I am talking about is the entitlement that everyone feels on a daily basis. Just because your crap is smaller than someone else’s doesn’t mean it isn’t still a problem. We all perpetuate entitlement to varying degrees, and we need to realize that.